


together or not at all

by amizen



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Coming of Age, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:48:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24393787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amizen/pseuds/amizen
Summary: Renjun was a hardworking member of NCT.He finished his schedules, he learned the dances, he sang the songs.He was ordinary...but he had secrets he kept from his group.How long would he be able to keep them as secrets before they all found out?
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Nakamoto Yuta
Comments: 3
Kudos: 28





	together or not at all

**Author's Note:**

> Renjun was a hardworking member of NCT.  
> He finished his schedules, he learned the dances, he sang the songs.  
> He was ordinary
> 
> ...but he had secrets he kept from his group.
> 
> How long would he be able to keep them as secrets before they all found out?

Every day in Ncity was an eventful day. Whenever the members were together, it was automatically guaranteed to be quite the adventure. It was a constant all the members could depend on. With the demanding jobs they each held, their only time to relax was together and every member knew that the best way to do so was to come together for a day filled with smiles and laughter and utter chaos. Their combined spirits were the best medicine and it made all their other worries melt away. Tonight was no exception to this.

When they debuted under their... _unique_ unit system, the members knew that in order to maintain their inter-unit team bonding, they would have to schedule regular meet-ups at the dorms. They met-up, all 21 of them, at least once a month like clockwork. Whether it be a full day or a couple of hours not a crumb of free time would be wasted and there were no exceptions to cancel, ever. It was NCT tradition and tradition it would stay.

The hosting dorms would change according to whichever dorm seemed clean enough to walk around freely in. Today was the 127 hyungs’ turn to host, which was normally expected since they were the unit with the most neat-freaks, what to say other than they clean up well for meet-ups, and they collectively decided on a movie night, the perfect way to rewind after running around all day, each unit with their own events and each member with their own customized schedule from hell, courtesy of the sm staff.

Back in the dream dorms, Renjun was the first member to be ready to leave, physically that is. Mentally, the poor boy was going through absolute torture. He had been hiding a secret from all his members and each time they had their monthly meet-up, it was becoming tremendously harder to keep to himself. At times he wanted to shout it to the world to let everyone know. Other times he promised himself he’d take this secret to the grave. He was attracted to men, and while that definitely did not seem like the end of the world, he was currently attracted to one specific man: Nakamoto Yuta. He tried to deny it at first. He said he just admired him and respected him as an artist. _What a load of bullshit._ Once he came to terms with the fact that he had a crush on one of his members he thought life would be easier. No one ever told him that dealing with an unrequited crush would be even harder.

As much as Renjun hated the thought of his secret getting out, his excitement to see his hyungs almost always trumped all else. Today was different. Today he had some sort of gut feeling that the gathering was not going to go right so he did what every sane person would do, he pulled out _all_ the stops to get out of it.

He first tried telling his fellow roommate-less dorm member about how he just wasn’t feeling up to going to their hyungs’ dorm later that week. Jeno being the lovely human he is, laughed in his face and told him to “Man-up and come on hyung. We rarely get to see them all so just show up.” _Man-up._ He knew he was just giving a normal response but the word choice left a bitter taste in his mouth. He never thought he’d be hearing those same words again after he left. _Get those thoughts out of your head and move on Renjun._ With a shake of his head, he came up with a new tactic.

Renjun’s genius-self attempted to pull a classic “pretend-your-sick”. He wrapped himself in blankets for roughly an hour to get his temperature up and get him sweating. He sang his heart out to songs well out of his range to achieve the most believable sore throat. The final touches were done with some pink eyeshadow to his nose and some powder to make him look pale and sickly. Doubling himself over in the mirror he looked absolutely atrocious. _Perfect._

The incredible performance he put on honestly deserved a Tony but the adult who discovered him could, unfortunately, be fooled by none. Taeyong had decided that today was the perfect day to come over to meet his dongsaengs earlier than their scheduled meeting because a rare occasion occurred where Lee Taeyong was free from work for a couple of hours. His hyung came into his room hearing coughing (practice, that was not meant for him to hear). Taeyong saw right through his act and almost whooped his butt for the stunt he pulled, especially considering he was a singer for a living shredding his vocal cords. He hesitated to punish his dongsaeng due to the overpowering worry he felt for what reason might have caused Renjun to even try this. Knowing Renjun though, he simply gave him a proper verbal scolding and left him saying he would be seeing him again later that day at the meet-up, no questions asked.

Seeing that he wasn’t going to get out of going, Renjun was forced to give up. But he had a plan. Go there, put on a smile, stay in a corner, and don’t talk to anyone. _Easy._ And that was the only way to make sure his secret wouldn’t get out. He had to put up a front because god knows what his members would think if he was like _that._

Each dorm would arrive at different times but, surprisingly, the dreamies always made it before the other functioning adults of the group. Of course, they were endlessly teased that the children could get there before the WayV members and even some of the 127 hosts. While waiting for everyone else’s arrival, the dreamies helped the present hyungs to set up snacks and such. While setting up, slowly but surely, the remaining people made their way to the dorms. Some exchanged greetings and heated decision-making later, everyone was settled in and around the several couches and chairs in the living room and had decided that watching the original Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory was the way to go. They all settled in and, other than the hushed conversations, the humming of the soundtrack, and the occasional “wait, what does that mean?” in various languages, it was surprisingly quiet.

Renjun, on the other hand, was completely convinced that anyone within a 3-mile radius could hear the powerful thumping of his heart. It was going at a speed too fast to be healthy but Renjun could not will his heart to stop. He was seated at the edge of the couch originally thinking he would be guaranteed that no one unexpected would sit next to him. He had Sicheng on his left, a trusted hyung, and empty space on his right. That was until someone decided to make Sicheng sit on the ground in front and make Renjun scoot over to make space. The seating had updated to now occupy Youngho hyung on his left, Sicheng hyung in front of him, and the cause of his constant state of heart attack and anxiety snug on his right flank, Yuta.

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first ever fanfic so please go easy on me. idk how consistent ill be with updates but ill try my best for at least a chapter a week. i promise it'll get better if u stick around so i encourage you to do so. anyways hope you enjoyed. have a great rest of ur week~ byeee!!! 
> 
> author out


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